Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Who's doing the thinking around here?

I've completely lost touch with my pre-kid self. I thought I'd be the kind of person that could still be a great friend to all my old pals, just with a few more people in tow. Right? Talk about delusional!

My dear friend is getting married in November and she asked that my daughter and older son be a part of wedding party. My little princess is one month shy of her 6th birthday and my little tank is truly 4......stop laughing.

What was I thinking? First of all, their only exposure to her after they were born was at their baptisms and a couple of birthday parties. Although, they are veterans at this since they were "officially" a part of 2 weddings. So, my vision of it is that the princess gets another fabulous dress to add to her collection and my little tank can actually fit into the rented tux! I couldn't wait to take pictures!! I had already mentally written off being able to enjoy the wedding, since (1) my kids would demand 1000% of my attention, (2) the wedding is an hour and half drive (without traffic) away, so...no pomegranate martinis for me! Did I mention that her wedding is scheduled to take place during their nap time?

This is my brain on kids.....Of course, I'm sure my friend has a vision of her wedding day that consists of my beautiful children being able to walk down the aisle and hit their cues with just one rehearsal. Me, being her swilling buddy from days past, would be able to give an amazing drunken speech telling the story of us dancing on the bar at Red Rock West in NYC. Why shouldn't she? She doesn't have kids!

I feel like I did her a great disservice by agreeing to this. I don't know what possessed me to assume that she understood that the kids may decide that they don't want to walk down the aisle in front of a bunch of strangers and stand at the alter for the ceremony, but would much rather splash around in the holy water or try to blow out the pretty candles.

Seriously, what am I going to do now? This is her big day. I feel like a schmo for not just saying "no".

Sunday, September 23, 2007

To blog or not to blog....

I am so new to this genre, that I had to go to the urbandictionary to find out the definition of 'blog'. Yes, I am truly lame.

I had been enjoying my time off and browsing all the web had to offer and I truly enjoyed discovering the 'mom blogs'. It was great to connect with other moms going through the same kind of emotional and physical process of having kids.

Let's face it. As moms we don't have the time or energy to cultivate the positive and supportive relationships that we need to maintain our sanity. I know for me, when our first child was born, I felt isolated, overwhelmed and clueless. We moved to a 'better' neighborhood, so I didn't know a soul. My social interaction was restricted to the local market ( I am grateful to them to this day!).

I know this is not particular to new moms. Our lives are moving at a record pace, so if you aren't lucky enough to have maintained a social circle that has grown and changed with you, you are lonely. The internet has allowed us to connect with people we would have not likely have met, let a lone liked. Being a little judgemental myself, I know there are people that I would have missed getting to know had I met them under more conventional settings.

So, what was my point? When I mentioned to a friend and my sister-in-law that I discovered the blogs, I was surprised by their reaction. I got the impression I was no longer considered 'cool'. Whatever. This drove me to seek out the urbandictionary. The definitions I found there were none too flattering. It gave me pause.

I continued to read the blogs I had discovered and found that it was still fun to read. I find them to be reassuring and entertaining. So, thank you to those that continue to put your thoughts out there. To those that find them to be the ramblings of the narcissistic, f-off!

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

One blog too many

I think I may have got a little overly excited about discovering blogs. The mom track went so well, I thought I'd take a look at other interests in my life. So, I put in a search....USMC. Sadly, I was disappointed.

I served in the Marines from 86-91. This is something of which, I am proud. I served my country and proud to still call myself a Marine. What I am not so proud of is some of the lame ass macho bs that it attracts. Seriously, the people I served with that were most memorable were the ones that truly encompassed the ideals of being a Marine. There were just so many others, as in the fire service, that hid behind the title with false bravado. You know the ones.

I often wonder how people like this see themselves. They know they are cowards or shallow in character, but yet, use attitude and tough talk to mask these shortcomings. I will not expose myself voluntarily to these people anymore.

Sunday, September 16, 2007

The Breakfast Club!

I love this movie. I graduated in 1984 and I remember how profound I thought this movie was. What's the message? Look past the labels we place on people and you may find yourself a friend? High school really sucks? Any other universal truths are lost on me right now.

I think I identify with Ally Sheedy's character.....

Saturday, September 15, 2007


Insouciant. This must be the new 'it' word. The last 3 books I've read used this word waaaaay too many times. It's a pretentious way to say 'i don't give a crap'. Nonchalant, carefree....whatever. So not me.

I used to think I was carefree. Then I had kids. Now I care about every little detail of my children's lives.....to the point of distraction. There is so much to think about that I can't prioritize. Are my children watching too much TV? Did they poop today?

I'm on the second day of recovery from knee surgery and the pain meds aren't working....gah! I am sitting in my room listening to my family go through their morning routine. It sounds like heaven from here, but I know it's hell out there. Funny, their squeals and complaints make me smile when I don't have to respond to their demands or referree their disputes.

If only I could maintain this perspective, I may discover my insouciance......

Friday, September 14, 2007

So it begins...

I am not organized, witty, or interesting. I just enjoy seeing my thoughts in writing. Yes, this is about me. Well....me and my fabulous family.

I just had knee surgery and am laid up for the next 3 days. It was a simple procedure, so I'm hoping to get my fat ass out of bed soon....the advantage is I get to laze around....well, hold that thought...my kids are invading.....

I'm not sure I'll be able to keep posting once my knee is better, but whatever.

My first born just started kindergarten last week and I am now able to sift through the mounds of information that the school has sent home. The note that I HAVE to comment on is from the principal about the next morning meeting. One of the topics to be discussed pertains to the elaborate morning student drop off routine. In particular, how Hummers and similiarly sized vehicles affect this routine.

I am sick of having to spend my minimal amount of free time on developing policies to help people not have to think or be responsible for themselves. A letter from a parent expressed a desire to develop a policy to have large vehicles park along the street instead of being able to use the drop off lanes and/or parking lots to bring their children to school.

The necessity stems from the fact that this parent was nearly hit by another car exiting the area because there was a Hummer "in the way". Seriously, people....how about people learning how to drive on streets, alleyways, parking lots, etc. that have various sized vehicles on them? When I pull up along side a large vehicle with my little car, I am cautious as I ease out into traffic lanes assuming that other vehicles may not see me(thinking). When I am driving my big ass car I look to see that the area is clear of big and small cars(taking responsibility). How hard is that? Are we really a community that needs to make a policy every time we have come across a situation?

My pain meds are starting to wear off.